I seem to have a cacophony of thoughts in my head and want to blog about, but each time that I sit down and actually TRY to write it down, it all flies out of my head. Go figure.
Procrastination seems to be the order of the day for me...I always tell myself to finally start getting my lazy bum to do stuff, but it always seem to lead to other things. Self-discipline - zilch. *sigh* Maybe it's something to do with me not exactly enjoying what I do, but at the moment, it's not something I can get out of just yet...which makes it an unending spiral I guess. Work just for the pay, but the pay's not that good anyways, and yet can't get out of it coz of the stupid bond...yadda yadda yadda.
Got into a little 'debate' with a friend the other day about me hating my job and the possibility of changing fields/careers. While I'm quite sure about myself not being able to continue in my current field (due to lack of interest), but I'm not sure where I want to head to. All I know is I don't really like what I do now, and yet I can't seem to think of where do I branch off next...enters said friend who talked about the one thing that I disliked most: SALES. When people talk to me about sales, the only thing that always spring to mind is this well-dressed person with a huge suitcase, going about to convince other people to buy their products. That, or you know those people standing at the mall, getting people to subscribe to their services? Those were my impressions on sales.
I can't seem to put myself in those shoes because:
- I don't have the gift of the gab to talk to people effortlessly and make them comfortable enough to listen and eventually get my points on why my products/services are worth their time and money. People who know me thinks I'm too quiet and up to some point, almost invisible...how does THAT sell stuff?
- I don't have the 'look' to go with it. Let's face it, how many people in sales look like me? I'm not saying that sales people have to be pretty, but they are at least easy on the eyes...so unlike me, warts, pimples and all. And before anybody says that looks do not play a part, let me ask you a question: Compare between two sales people - 1 is a good-looking, slim and well-dressed person. The other: not-so-good-looking, has acne all over the face, wears glasses, fat by Asian standards, and couldn't dress as well as the first sales person. Who do you think you would veer towards more?
- It is not that I haven't tried...I did try to do sales. AIESEC projects in uni got me going around like an idiot selling tickets and what not. Did about a couple of MLM ventures too, to no success (never got a single person to sign up). I even did a stint at a festival booth, trying to sell digital cameras. I never got re-offered the same job. 'Nuff said.
And then, said friend talked about us being sales people even when we're working office jobs. We're selling our time and effort for a pay. Yes, I've heard it all before...I guess I'm probably stubborn. Probably coz I got all these bad experiences from doing the actual door-to-door kind of sales as opposed to other companies. Or maybe I'm just not convicted enough with my products to make me want to sell it....dunno. I guess time will tell if I can venture into sales again. As of now, I shudder at the thought.
Arm's feeling a little better...it doesn't hurt that much when I do my exercises, but I still can't lift the hand up high without feeling it's SOOOO heavy or me feeling pain and looking at the awkward curvature of the arm before stopping. Been going to a Chinese sensei for herbal wraps to make sure the bones are mending properly. Seems to be working, but it felt quite expensive after a few times...can you imagine paying about RM40 every 3-4 days? That's a heck lot of money! But I guess as my Mom says, 'We cannot be frugal with healing'.
Oh, and physiotherapy session is coming up....more stretching and new exercises to help me get my arm use back. Can't help but wonder how come after each therapy session, I would feel extremely sore for the next 2 days...literally can't lift my arm a lot! So scary sometimes that I feel I might have overdone it with the sessions, but I guess the therapists know best. Next week I go for an x-ray to see if my bones are mending properly. Looking at my arm condition, it doesn't seem to be (it feels curved instead of straight like my right arm!) and I'm a little worried about that. Fingers crossed that I won't need surgery or something drastic.
I seem to be blabbing more than I wanted to. Will stop now to see if I can organize my thoughts further...heh!
